soggy gummy bears

Why do children so enjoy ripping the heads off innocent gummy bears? There is something so satisfactory when sinking your teeth into their gelatinous tummies.

Aren't they made from cow hooves or something?

I've noticed that I always stretch my gummies before devouring them.

My personal record for the longest-stretched Swedish fish ever seen was at least a foot long and as thick around as a string of yarn.

I don't like Swedish fish.

Why are they Swedish, anyways?

Why not German, or, I dunno, Irish? Dutch? Polish?

Saudi Arabian fish... that's a new one.

When you stretch a gummy and lick it, it disintigrates immediately. Why?!?!?

It's so stinking weird.

Oh by the way can anyone juggle Tic-tacs with their tongue? I had a dream about that last night. Lots of tictacs, orange tic tacs. Those are the best. I am looking for recruits for my Tic-tac tongue artist traveling troupe.

P.S. Does anyone else get huge sores on their tongues if they eat too many skittles?? It seems that I am the only one....

What is caramel's problem?

Caramel is just so stinking yummy and so stinking sticky. Grr. It is constantly getting snarled in my teeth. It stinks!!! Can't I enjoy three bites of chocolate coated sugarry goodness without having to worry about my dental health?

Why can't we enjoy a Snickers without licking our teeth self-consciously? Why can't we bite into a Twix without reflecting on dental bills? Cheez an bread!! Why can't we bite into a hunk of caramel without dreading cavities?

Walking around with black, cavity-speckled teeth isn't so bad if you get to have a worry-free consumation of a candy bar!!!

Well.... maybe not, but still!

Whoever discovered that sugar is a big fat meanie to teeth was an even bigger fatter meanie to our sweet toothes.

I don't like dentistry.

Candy is nicer.

Namely, caramel and chocolate.

Now go eat a frozen Twix and get your teeth stuck in the caramel. It's good for your soul.

But maybe not your teeth.

Harrumph... curse that dreaded Influenza.

If I forgot to mention this earlier, I am currently suffering from the flu.
So when I threw up after dinner... I discovered a wonderful new shade of pink.
(My dinner included three glasses of grape juice... does influenza make you have cravings? Because grape juice and rocky road ice cream have been sounding real good lately...)

Grape-juice-vomit-mixed-with-cough-medicine-in-the-wonderful-lighting-of-the-toilet-pink.

Appetizing.

I wonder what it would look like on my bedroom walls...

there is mutiny in the air... coming from my candy stash

I know this probably will make me sound crazy (who says I'm not?) but I think my leftover Valentine's Day candy is watching me...

I shouldn't have been so obvious about my lack of interest in the hard, fruit flavored candy.
Instead I dove straight for the chocolate.

What is the deal with women and chocolate!?!??
Grr.

So now I'm convinced that when I take my first bite out of that Tootsie Roll Pop, I'll choke on it.

Ah, the romance of Valentine's Day.

hard candy crushed beneath a shoe

Welcome to the candy shop! Don't you hate it when you reach in a bag of candy and that little piece of joyness is broken, snapped in half? Such a disappointment.
So, cracked~candy was born! Technically it has nothing to do with what I will post here... but it's a cool name, right?

I ammend that last statement-- it's a cool name, and it's given my some ideas... maybe I'll stay on that subject: candy.

Well I guess I'll write more later.
May your sweets stay sticky!